The desired forgettable, yet unforgettable moments of marriage

Part 1

We all have these moments, don't we?  You know, the moments that you never want to relive.  The moments that you pray everyone will forget.  The moments that make your cheeks turn red just thinking about it.  The moments you wish you could forget, but you know will never be forgotten.  Well, I figured since there was no hope of these memories ever being forgotten, I might as well record them.  So please, enjoy mine and Taylor's desired forgettable, yet unforgettable moments of marriage.

A couple of weeks before Taylor and I were married, Taylor's parents bought Taylor a brand new (and extremely nice!) suit.  A parting gift of sorts.  It was actually the suit picked out for him to wear for our wedding.  I loved it, and he sure looked handsome in it.  About two weeks after we were married, Taylor and I were getting ready for church, when the incident happened.  
Taylor turned to me and asked, "Have you seen my suit pants?"
"Nope, I don't think so."
"I swear I put them right here." Taylor said as he pointed to the end table at the foot of our bed.
My eyes widened with realization, "Oh no..."
"What?" Taylor asked.
I ran into the laundry room, opened the dryer, and rummaged through the warm clothes inside, silently praying that his suit pants would not be among the other clothes.  Sure enough, they were there.  I pulled them out slowly, and looked up at Taylor who had just walked in.  Taylor gingerly lifted the pants out of my hands and held them up.  His suit pants were now the size of twelve-year-old Taylor (or 21-year-old Kelli).  
My eyes filled with tears as I hurriedly tried to explain what had happened, "I'm so sorry! I grabbed the whole pile of clothes that was sitting on that table and just stuck them all in the washer.  I didn't look!  I know that you can't wash suit pants...I know that!  I just didn't look...I just assumed!  I'm so sorry! I'm such a horrible wife!"  I rambled, without pausing for breath.
With his emotions unreadable, Taylor looked at me for a few seconds, and then slowly, ever so slowly, broke into a smile.  "It's okay, Kells.  They're just pants.  And you're not a horrible wife." Taylor threw the now-ruined pants over his shoulder and bent down to kiss me softly.  "Really, it's okay."  I was shocked when Taylor broke into laughter.  How is he laughing!?
Regardless, I still felt awful inside (and still do to this day!).  As much as I want to forget this embarrassing event, it is absolutely unforgettable.  The story is told at many family events--how the brand new suit was ruined by the brand new wife. ;) As Taylor likes to say, "The bad news, is that I no longer have a sweet suit.  The good news?  I now have a sweet sports jacket."
RIP handsome suit...
Hello, sports jacket!
Or how about this:

A couple of months ago, I decided to try out a new recipe.  I had been looking forward to it for days, and was so excited to try it out.  I slaved in the kitchen, and then placed on the table what I thought looked like perfection. A delicious casserole.  I excitedly told Taylor dinner was ready, and scooped a hearty amount on each of our plates.  After prayer was said, we dug in.  After the first bite, I stopped and looked up at Taylor, as a look of disgust spread across my face.
"I think I put way too much salt into this!  It's so salty!"  The disappointment in my failure must have registered across my face. 
Taylor quickly took another bite and said, "I think it tastes great!"
I was surprised as he continued to take bite after bite.  Maybe I just happened to get a really salty bite?  So I took another bite. Just as salty as the first. "No, Taylor! This is so gross! How are you eating this!?"
Taylor shrugged and said, "It's good." Maybe I just happened to scoop all of the salty parts on my plate?  So I took a bite off of his plate. Just as salty. Yuck!  At this point, I was extremely confused.  I just looked at him and asked, "You really like it?"
Taylor smiled between bites, "Love it." And kept eating. Salty bite after salty bite.  I sat there in amazement and just watched him eat what tasted like pure salt cubes.  Taylor scraped the last bite off of his plate and then set his fork down.  "You did great, Kells.  That was delicious." 
My disappointment faded as I slowly said, "Well...at least you liked it..." I was still shocked that he had eaten his whole plate. But maybe my dinner wasn't a total failure after all! 

About an hour later, I found Taylor sprawled on the couch, with a pained look on his face.  
"You okay?" I asked him.
"Fine." He responded.
"You don't look okay.  Are you sick?"
Taylor opened his eyes as a half-smile spread across his face.  "Too much salt."
At first I was confused, but as realization hit, I started to laugh uncontrollably.  "Why did you keep eating it!?"  I asked him in between laughs.
"I just couldn't bare to see your disappointment.  I didn't want you to think that you failed."  Taylor squeezed his eyes shut and gave a small moan as his hand reached to his stomach.  He opened one eye and squinted up at me. "I don't think I liked that casserole..." And then, regardless of my guilt and Taylor's wounded stomach, neither one of us could control ourselves...we broke into uncontrollable laughter.  Now, every time I cook, Taylor has to monitor the salt amounts.  He will never let me forget this or live it down.

While this picture isn't directly related to the incident, I feel as if it captures
 my emotions during this particular dinner perfectly.
Now, don't be fooled.  Taylor isn't innocent of these particular incidents.  And here's proof:

On the way home from BYU one day, Taylor and I were talking about various things.  As we were walking to our front door, Taylor sighed heavily and said, "I wish I was single again." 
I whipped around, and exclaimed, "What?!"
Taylor's eyes grew wide as his hand slapped against his mouth. "That came out so wrong!  That's not what I meant!"  I could see Taylor's mind frantically backtracking, attempting to eat the words that had just come out of his mouth. "I was just reading about a study abroad through BYU...and I was thinking about how I wished I could do one...but you can't be married.  I don't really wish I was single again...I was just saying that...oh, geez. There's no way to recover from this one..."
Taylor covered his face with his hands, then, like a six-year-old boy, peeked through his fingers and asked quietly, "Forgive me?"
Of course, I forgave him.  But you'd be wrong if you assumed the whole incident was forgotten.  I've never let him live it down ;) My husband actually said, "I wish I was single again."
Definite wrong words to say. ;)
Even though he didn't mean it that way and wishes I'd forget about it altogether, I still like to tease him about it.

There are plenty more of these incidents within the Gilbert home.  That's why this is only Part 1.  Look forward to more.  And together, we'll record the desired forgettable yet unforgettable moments of our marriage.

Thank goodness for crazy love in these type of situations :)

1 comment: